Carrick
Logline
A guilt ridden decorated war hero reluctantly returns to his home town in football loving Texas, finding a job as a teacher at his old high school.
Genre
Drama,Family,War
Short Summary
script - pilot Set in small town Texas, a decorated war veteran returns to the town he grew up in in order to alleviate the demons from his past by visiting the wife of a childhood friend who was killed in action. An incident in a local diner sets of a series of events which lead him to a new job.
With his military history unknown to all but a select few, the protagonist finds seeks personal redemption by obtaining a job as a teacher and football coach at his former high school, where he meets an attractive fellow teacher whilst promising to look after the family his dead friend.
Setting
Texas - small town
Based on a True Story
No
Plot - Premise
Internal Journey/Rebirth
Plot - Other Elements
Philosophical Questions,Happy Ending
Mature Audience Themes
Information not completed
Main Character Details
Name: John Carrick
Age: mid to late 30's
Gender: Male
Role: Protagonist
Key Traits: Masculine,Modest,Complex,Confident,Educated,Honorable,Leader,Patriotic,Selfless,Skillful,Secretive,Strong Moral Code
Additional Character Details
The author has not yet written this
Additional Character Details
The author has not yet written this
Additional Character Details
The author has not yet written this
Development Pitch
A disheveled vagrant stands up for a trio of wholesome, introverted students from the local high school who are being bullied by some well heeled football playing classmates in a diner. A one sided fight sees John Carrick arrested, which introduces a myriad of characters from his past, including the local law enforcement officers, as well as an old friend who is now the principal (Samuels) of the high school. Nightmares haunt his sleep that night, until he decides to pay a visit to the wife (Jessie) of the classmate (Jimmy) he enlisted with after 9/11, who was killed on the battlefield. Jessie says she doesn't blame him, and then hands him an unopened letter from Jimmy. The students ponder who was responsible for the commotion at the diner. A cleaned up Carrick agrees to take a job as a history teacher and assistant football coach, where he meets an attractive young teacher named Emily. His newfound purpose is explained at the conclusion of the pilot, where the voice over of Jimmy is the letter given to Carrick by Jessie. Jimmy asks Carrick to look after his family. Carrick reads it as the players gather for training. He looks at the players, who include the bullies who don't recognise him. He smiles - he has a mission again. The story has several themes, telling the tale of those who left to fight an impossible war, and the struggles they faced in a changing nation when they came home. It is about redemption for personal failings, and finding a sense of purpose in life.
Genre
DRAMA, ACTION
Brief
Carrick defends some high school students from bullying then reconnects with his best friend who comes to bail him out of jail. Carrick gets reacquainted with his hometown, facing his demons. His friend Samuels, the high school principal, offers him a job as a history teacher and football coach. The kids he saved start to question who the new teacher is.
Overall Rating
GOOD
Narrative Elements
Authors Writing Style: GOOD
Characterization: EXCELLENT
Commerciality: GOOD
Franchise Potential: EXCELLENT
Pace: EXCELLENT
Premise: GOOD
Structure: EXCELLENT
Theme: GOOD
Accuracy of Book Profile
Yes, the script profile accurately reflects the script.
Draw of Story
The opening scene is of Carrick stopping some bullies. He looks homeless but has considerable fighting skills. It creates intrigue around the character and where the story will go. This is the first episode of a series so the hook is clear by the end.
Possible Drawbacks
The script is a solid pilot episode. It introduces the characters, the story and dynamics. It is a little predictable. When a strange, homeless looking man confronts the bullies and they begin to underestimate him, the obvious action is that he is a highly trained fighter and beats them up.
Use of Special Effects
THE STORY DOES NOT RELY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS
Primary Hook of Story
The hook is that ex solider, Carrick, finds himself back in his hometown coaching football. I would watch the show for the eventual character arc for Carrick. He has some emotional obstacles to face and some demons to let go. Small town shows have a cozy charm which comes through in this script.
Fanbase Potential
This could have a large fanbase. Wholesome, small town dramas always find an audience. There have been many recent shows that are successful through streaming.
Awards Potential
This could have awards potential. This show is a pilot, but there is a lot of room to explore with character development. Carrick is a hardened soldier who feels responsible for the death of his friend who enlisted with him. He has stayed away from his hometown and roots until now. There is a loner who is reconnect which is a recipe for drama and great character moments.
Envisioned Budget
MEDIUM BUDGET
Similar Films/TV Series
VIRGIN RIVER, FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS
What’s New About the Story
The story is not very original. There are many small town stories where the protagonist comes home and has to find their fit back in their old town. This is just the first episode and has room to be more unique.
Lead Characters
The lead character is the typical solider that comes back from war which has changed him. He is carrying guilt for his friends death and trauma from his time there. There is room for him to stand out more.
Uniqueness of Story
This is not a rare gem. There are many shows similar to it. This is the first episode so there is room for it to become a gem.
Possible Formats
Television
Analyst Recommendation
CONSIDER
Justification
Small town shows are generally popular with audiences. This has the potential to have to same charm and drama as many successful shows. Carrick is on track to being a well loved character. It is a very American story with Friday night football and hangouts at the diners so it would find a decent fanbase.