SUSPENSE, THRILLER, DRAMA

It’s 1880’s. A boy who doesn’t know his name, at the age of 11 or 13, is being chased by hunters who had killed his parents, home pets, and cows. He escapes over a mountain with his young sister on his back and finds the hunters still on his trail. The boy sets out to escape the hunters, not knowing where to go, when a couple offers to look after the little girl. With no money or food, he learns how to steal to survive on the road. The boy is put in the custody of the man who took his sister in to protect her. The loss of his childhood leaves his future uncertain.

FAIR

THIRD PERSON

Authors Writing Style: FAIR

Characterization: GOOD

Commerciality: FAIR

Franchise Potential: FAIR

Pace: FAIR

Premise: FAIR

Structure: FAIR

Theme: FAIR

Yes, the description is accurate.

The story opens with the boy running from hunters who brutally killed his parents and home pets. As the tragic events are a mystery, the audience will be intrigued to find out more about what took place and why the boy, who doesn't even know his name, is being chased.

The lack of explanations as to why the boy was being hunted or why his family was murdered was frustrating. The Old West was known for crimes committed by violent outlaws, but it would be interesting to learn what motivated the hunters to target that family or even why the boy doesn’t know his name or age.

THE STORY DOES NOT RELY ON SPECIAL EFFECTS

The boy's escape journey is fascinating and cinematographic. He tries to find food, water, and weapons for his safety in his attempt to survive. He meets people who will help him and learns to detect those who might try to exploit his innocence. His adventure can be explored in more detail, adding riveting suspense sequences.

It's not a story for fanbases; however, the narrative about a boy struggling to survive and keep her sister alive from hunters is captivating and sure to draw the audience.

It is possible to tell this story to catch the attention of the Awards, especially if exploring the reasons why the boy was being chased or why his family was targeted to be murdered, and why the boy doesn’t know his name or age. These factors can make people identify with his story.

LOW BUDGET

THE LOST VOLCANO, SEVEN ALONE

This boy's lack of knowledge about his name or age is intriguing. He learns to survive by himself, even with a limited understanding of the basics. It would be interesting to find out more about what took place and motivated the hunters to chase him or target his family.

Even with a limited understanding of the basics, the boy learns quickly to trick people into making money during his journey on the road. As well, he has a giant heart, which makes him do whatever is necessary to save his sister from the hunters.

This story has the potential to become an engaging and unique narrative if the reasons for what's going on are explored. The boy has little understanding of his story, and the narrator does not provide enough details, making the narrative confusing or difficult to connect to.

Film: Studio, Indie TV Series: Cable, Limited Run / Mini-Series, Streaming

WORK IN PROGRESS

While the story has many positive points, it has room for improvement (see possible paths below). If you can't change the story at this point, my suggestion is using your notes as a guide to highlight the best aspects of it when taking the next steps, either putting a pitch page together, a treatment, or a presentation.

It would be interesting to learn what motivated the hunters to target that family or even why the boy doesn’t know his name or age.